The quiet comforter.

"Do not believe that he who seeks to comfort you lives untroubled among the simple and quiet words that sometimes do you good. His life has much difficulty....Were it otherwise he would never have been able to find those words."

Rainer Maria Rilke. 

Life is difficult?

Psychiatrist M. Scott Peck open his best selling book The Road Less Travelled with the words "Life is difficult." He went on to say, "Most do not fully see this truth that life is difficult. Instead they moan more or less incessantly.......about the enormity of their problems, their burdens, and their difficulties as if life were generally easy, as if it should be easy." 

John Maxwell adds this, "Because we want to believe life should be easy, we sometimes assume anything that's difficult must be impossible. When success eludes us, we are tempted to throw in the towel and assume it's unattainable."

Peck is right, we often feel that we deserve a life that is easy and when anything less comes our way we feel short changed. Maybe we should just face it, as the now famous quote from Malcolm Fraser states, "Life wasn't meant to be easy."

We face challenges everywhere, some minor and some which are seemingly impossible to overcome. Think back to the past and of the insurmountable problems that you have faced in your life. If you can remember them, they will mostly seem insignificant now, nothing more than a speed bump on the road of life.

As I am often telling people, "It's not the problem that determines who you are, rather it's how you handle the effects after the problem has gone away. It's how you relate to people who went through it with you and it's what you learned by the experience."

Life would be boring if we faced no challenges. Challenges are Gods' way of stretching us so that we can learn and grow and be better prepared for this wonderful life we have been given. 

So life is difficult. 

Bring it on.

Gimli Glider

A show on TV the other night was about an Air Canada Boeing 767 which, in 1982, ran out of fuel long before it had reached its destination. How this happened is still a little suspect to me, however during the investigation it was discovered that the re-fueller had made a mis-calculation and instead of putting fuel onboard in kilos he had calculated the weight in pounds. This gave the aircraft around half the required amount of fuel.

Subsequently they ran out of fuel during flight and the pilot managed to glide the aircraft into a landing. This was a fantastic effort on behalf of the crew and one which allowed for no error. An aircraft such as this (see photo top left) weighing around 170,000 kg and with no power only descends, as it cannot climb without stalling.

They managed to land on a disused runway at Gimli and the aircraft suffered only minor damage. It was flow out only two days later and has only just retired from service. The clip below is the last fly past of this aircraft.

Change for the better.

Our society is continually on the move. Life is always changing and we feel have to change in order to keep up. We change schools, we change jobs, we change friends, we change opinions, we change homes, we change cities where we live and we even often change our spouse.

Why are we doing this?

John Maxwell in his book titled Today Matters, suggests one reason is that we are looking for success. 

He says " We believe success is impossible, so we criticise it. We believe success is mystical, so we search for it. We believe success comes from luck, so we hope for it. We believe success is productivity, so we work for it. We believe success comes from opportunity, so we wait for it. We believe success comes from leverage, so we power up for it. We believe success comes from connections, so we network for it. We believe success comes from recognition so we strive for it. We believe success is an event, so we schedule it."

Dale Carnegie, author of How to Win Friends and Influence People quotes "Many people think that if they were only in some other place, or had some other job, they would be happy. Well that is doubtful. So get as much happiness out of what you are doing as you can and don't put off being happy until some future date."

How often do we see people change jobs because they're "not happy". They start the new job and in a short time they're again "not happy". They change homes for the same reason and with the same result. The list of things that they change goes on and on, all with the same result, they're still "not happy". They want success in their life, yet it is elusive.

If one of the reasons our society is continually changing is that we are looking for success then I certainly believe in knowing what we want and going for it.

Change for the sake of change doesn't do it for me.

The correct use of positioning can however, be of great value.

Positioning is about being in the right place to allow a positive change to take place.

If you have a problem with alcohol and wish to correct this area of your life, then it would make sense not to continue frequenting bars. However, it is sometimes not that easy. You must position yourself so that going to the bar is not an option. Sadly this may involve changing friends. This is where most people have trouble because it is in their friends that they find their own identity and changing friends means they will lose that identity.

People who are not happy in their job often cite poor pay or conditions as the reason. I often find that it is their attitude that is poor because other things in their life are not going well.

We need to look at ourselves and ask, Why am I having a problem in this area?

If it's your attitude then get a better one. Stop confiding in negative people. 

As Dale Carnegie, also quotes: "Any fool can criticise, condemn and complain, and most fools do."

Find someone to whom you aspire and get alongside them.

Stop watching negative shows on TV and stop reading the gossip magazines. 

If it doesn't have a positive influence in your life then get rid of it.

Sometimes in our quest for greater success we take a job in another city. Where's the problem with this?

When we are successful, it is often as a result of not only our input but also the efforts of many other people who are alongside us. Put simply, they make us look good.

Take yourself out of this environment and go elsewhere and you will not have this same support network which you previously relied upon. If we haven't recognised the fact that others have contributed to our success then we may be setting up to fail.

Position yourself in such a way that you will have a good support network of friends and mentors. If you don't already have this network, then start getting one today.

Position yourself in such a way that you will have every chance of becoming a better person, leader, parent, spouse, sibling or friend.

Family

Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one.

Jane Howard. "Families".

We miss you Jessica.

Since you left us to start the next phase of your life there's an emptiness here that that doesn't want to be filled.

It's amazing how families grow on you. 

Twenty three years ago you came into our life. 

I remember it as though it were yesterday. 

Looking through old photos just hurts, so I don't do it, for now I'll just go on the memories that I have retained of our life together.

What we leave behind.

What we leave behind.

What does this mean?

Do many of us think about that?

Well, when we're gone, what legacy are we going to leave for those left on earth?

I was reminded of this question last night as I was listening to Steve Kennedy speak at a leadership meeting which we attended.

"I am not my father" he said. 

These words refreshed in me, a time when I uttered those same words "I am not my father".

Steve was talking about not repeating the same mistakes his father had. 

I'd said it because I was not going to become the same person my father was.

Like Steve, I belong to a large family, six brothers and one sister. I was the youngest.

Though we siblings were a fun loving lot, our father was almost always angry. I never knew why. He worked, like all fathers did, to supports us through school and buy clothes and food. But he was angry. Where did this come from?

Dad wasn't a drinker, though he did like his beer and on Anzac day he often enjoyed too many rums at the R.S.L.

He didn't even drink until during the second world war and even then it was difficult to get.

He was in the R.A.A.F yet didn't leave Australia.

Why was he angry?

I still don't know.

My fathers father spent very little time at home and was mostly working away, wherever the work was. This was in the early part of the 20th century.

I have been told that his mother was always angry. Why?

My oldest brother left home at age 14. Why?

All of us had, at some time or other had fallen out with our father. Why?

My last words with him were an argument.

Were we like him, angry?

The answer to that question for some of us was yes. Why?

My father died last year aged 95 and yes for the most part he was still angry.

I went home for his funeral and, putting aside the sadness felt when you lose a parent, I was overcome by a sensation of sadness for a life that had been lived yet a life that hadn't achieved all that it could've been. 

A life that left a legacy of sadness.

I witnessed my oldest brother's sadness and pain as he was barely ably to make it to the funeral, yet he lived only two hours drive away. 

A brother who showed no emotion at all. 

Another, stricken with grief, who was there at the end as he had helped care for our dad in his last days.

Two didn't come at all.

None of his offspring lived in the same city as he did.

95 years of life had come to this. Why?

Now the anger had turned to sadness. Why?

I committed then not to be like my father.

I want to be remembered for positive things. 

Things I've achieved. People I've helped. Lives I've touched.

I attended the Hillsong Mens conference not long after this and Paul Scanlon started one of his sessions with the words "I am not my Father". This got my attention.

Paul was preaching from his book of the same title.

He was inspired to write this book because during his time in ministry he was finding that he was now counselling young men with the same issues that he had counselled their fathers.

Why was history repeating he asked.

Paul himself had an interesting childhood, which he talks about in the book, and he wrote the book as a way of helping men not turn into their fathers.

So, without going into a complete book review here, I have determined to not become my father.

I have realised that, if left unchecked, we all have a tendency to become what our fathers themselves became.

I have drawn a line in the sand and said enough, it ends here, I am going to be different.

I am going to leave a positive legacy with my family and the people to whom I am close.

Men who have had great fathers might say they wouldn't mind being the same as their father. I say your right, but you still need to be an individual and your sons need to be encouraged to be individuals as well. Don't let them be just a younger you.

As I get older I realise that with age comes a responsibility to encourage younger people to be all that they can.

I have determined that what has gone before me, is not going after me.

I am not my Father.

Steve Kennedy

Well the breakfast was great.

Steve Kennedy was his usual self, making us laugh seemingly at will.

His message was a good one though....Know what you want, set your goals and go for it.

Steve also had some great advice when it comes to seeking a mentor and that is sometimes you have to be the one that does pursuing and again, don't give up.

Breakfast with Steve Kennedy

Tomorrow @ 8am is breakfast with Steve Kennedy.

Steve will be speaking at our Mens breakfast and is sure to draw a large number of men from different churches, keen to hear what God has to say.

I can taste the bacon and eggs now.

True test.

Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.

              Abraham Lincoln.

How good was that?

Qld 30 - NSW nil.

What a game.

Plenty of comment around here as to why Qld didn't or couldn't play like in the first game.

Good question.

However it's now down to the decider in Sydney.

State of Origin tonight

This one to be played at the great Lang Park in Brisbane.

Qld down one nil, this is a must win for the Maroons.

I'm a Queenslander so it's the maroons to win tonight.

Tip for success

Quoted by author Og Mandino.

"The only certain measure of success is to render more and better service than expected. 

If you want job security make it your goal to be worth more than your salary. 

People who do only what they are paid to do are not earning an increase."

How many times have we received service that we felt was below standard? 

These three sentences sum up an excellent attitude toward service and the workplace. 

Think about it.

Apply this attitude and you will enjoy success in your work and life. 

Cats

Some would say that I'm a cat lover.

I'm not, I just believe that they're here for my amusement.

If you want to see me laugh, just show me a funny cat video

or two.

Church "Pirates"

Wow, I've just listened to this gem from Ed Young.

Ed's a straight shooter and again pulls no punches.

We belong to a church that has just had a voluntary change of leadership and it's amazing how many people were led away by "pirate" leaders from our own church.

These so called leaders really are building on a foundation of deceit. They should question the loyalty of their new members because, if they were so easily led once, they will do so again.

On a positive note, those who have remained are many and the numbers of new converts are growing by the week. Building on a solid foundation you see.

I recently viewed a great message on leadership from Ps Alun Davies. I can't post it here though. It's too big and I haven't got it anyway. 

I'll try and find where it can be sourced. Read about his great church here.